PREPARATION

  1. Choose a challenging relationship in your life
  2. Visualize the person in your mind’s eye
    • What emotions do they bring up for you?
    • What is the tone of that relationship?
    • What memories arise?
      • Bring up the emotions triggered, feel them, and describe them
  3. Realize that the person is a puppet of Hashem, placed there to awaken these exact feelings
transform your relationships

Meditation Steps

  1. Access Devekut through any techniques you have learned
  2. Picture the soul of the person in front of you
  3. Imagine that whatever happened was generated for you by Hashem, designed to trigger your darkness so that it can be transformed into light
    • Smile
    • Remember that Hashem loves you and that this all comes from Love
    • Try to say thank you, if you can
  4. Flip around your feelings by turning them back to Hashem.
    • Hurt? Vulnerable? Sad? – Remind yourself that you’re surrounded by and loved by Hashem. See how you’ve chosen to see yourself as separate from Hashem’s light – this is an illusion. They may have done something to hurt you, but you don’t have to *feel* hurt. Ask Hashem to return you to the Light.
    • Stifled? Trapped? – Hashem is showing you that you have veered away from His Light, a place of unlimited freedom and expansion. Release that feeling and step back into alma d’cheirut (the World of Freedom)
    • Betrayed? – Realize that HaShem is the only One in whom we should trust. Release dependence on man for your physical/emotional needs and turn back to Him. They may have acted in an untrustworthy way, but you don’t have to embody the feeling of betrayal.
    • Belittled? Trivialized? Why is my sense of self-respect based on that person? Know that you are infinitely holy and valuable as you dwell in the Divine Light. Release dependence on that person for your sense of self-esteem. Turn it back to HaShem.
  5. Go through each of the feelings one by one, and see how each feeling is a blessing from HaShem which becomes apparent once you become aware of it and turn it to the Light, to HaShem, thereby transforming the energy of that darkness. Go through each memory of this person in the same way- flooding each one with light, seeing HaShem in the situation and saying thank You to Him for bringing up those challenges.
    • Remember to have compassion for yourself as you do this, and that every middah has good at its root
    • Connect to the tzadikim, holy places to give you strength
  6. Picture the person in front of you again
    • Look at them with tremendous compassion, choosing to see their Divine soul which is higher than their actions and mistakes
    • Empathize with their soul, who is also frustrated at their mistakes, also struggling with their own anger, pain, sadness or hurt
    • Smile at it, and let it smile back at you
    • Shine light onto that soul, so it can shine light onto its body and begin to heal. Look at it with love
    • Dialogue with their soul, and ask it to help them with their challenges – it also wants healing
    • Ask HaShem to shine light onto their soul, Daat Elyon,so it’s more empowered to help its Daat Tachton
  7. When you look at that person, how do you feel about them now? Take some time to reevaluate how you view them. Pray for that relationship.
  8. Thank HaShem for the experience!

©The Elevation Project – Rav Doniel Katz

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